Queen Procrastinator, Mistress of Delay, Baroness of Later

Day one, I think I want to make a blog about procrastination . . .

Day two, I should probably sit down and devote some time to write that blog about procrastination . . .

Day three, what do I say in the blog about procrastination I’m going to write later?

Day four, Oh yeah I was going make a blog about procrastination . . .

Four weeks later here I am finally sitting down.

You know I’ve always been one to leave off to tomorrow what I could’ve done yesterday. So in the present I feel bad for not doing something yet the couch just feels so good some times. Example, I know I’m going to move soon. I’ve been talking about how I really need to clean out my entire space because I find stuff occasionally that I apparently kept since high school or middle school. Now I’m not saying my room is an episode of hoarders because it’s nowhere near that. I promise. I’m just saying there are some drawers I forget about or boxes in the back of my closet that never see the light. In my feeble attempt recently it became clear how my poorly designed closet has only about 2 feet of usable area. The ends are virtually black holes and once a dress, jacket, or whatever goes back there I forget all about it. Then go buy new clothes. It’s a pretty vicious cycle. It must of started for the human race after farming and food were more abundant. You procrastinate killing or collecting food, you go hungry and die. You forget to process food, it starts to rot, you get food poisoning and die. Your abundance of food attracts a neighboring hungry human passing by and while you’re lying in your food coma, he steals your food and stabs you, and you die. At least now our lack of initiative doesn’t now a day have the road to death as its immediate consequence.

I don’t know if you ever played Sims before but for a while, the game Sims was my super addiction. I’d play it like every chance I got free time. I prefer the computer version better because then I could have my little sim do more things and have more “real life” activities to do besides go to work. Well when I start to procrastinate on important stuff I like to picture myself as my game character. What would real life me want me to be doing in the game in order for me to better myself? For example, I want to get in shape. Who doesn’t? Well when my sim in the game gets off work she goes and runs on the treadmill until she’s super tired, she showers and then she does fun stuff before bed time. Well essentially we are all little sims and our bodies are our avatars. We know what it takes for us to better ourselves and in the game we are all prepared to send these little people to night class or practice their trade in order to get better and advance our lives, bodies, and material processions. It’s just the doing part in real life that gets a little tricky. Well as they say, mind over matter.

I’m sure step one in the process of overcoming this habit is probably like figure out why you procrastinate. 15 years later . . . . I find I’m so OCD on the inside that the task at hand seems so monumental I get overwhelmed and then go watch Love and Hip Hop. I definitely find the time to observe other peoples ratchetness but thoroughly scrub down the car? Forget about it!

Step two,  Figure out a way to combat laziness and deadline anxieties and will your body like your sim with a click of the mouse. That all being said, I’m serious when I say I’m the Queen of procrastination. Capital Q. So if anyone has any suggestions or theories about how to remedy this, feel free to comment below! We need to find a cure and sometimes it just takes a village! More to the point the with the amount of time it would take me to find a sure fire way to cure your procrastination . . . I could be watching some Family Guy reruns and enjoying my life . . . which I’m actually about to go do now . . . so yeah like I said, comment below and help me fix or finish this list! The whole of humanity is counting on YOU!

Leave a comment