Why do we settle?
First what is settling? Settling is when you get into a relationship with someone you know isn’t the best for you or even good enough for you. Do I have experience with this? ABSOLUTELY! Oh man, but why do we find ourselves in these relationships with men/women that seem to bring us down? For me I found that there are a few different reasons to make that mistake.
- Impatience- eager to not be alone or wait for the right one
- “Save A Hoe”- trying to help improve the other person or make them into your desired partner
- Low self-esteem- not thinking you can find better
- Fear- afraid to be alone or that you will never get married
Sad thing is that it takes a couple of times of wasting your time/life with someone before you finally learn. It’s just one of those things that takes the hard way. As frustrating as it can be there’s nothing to do but the time, keep your head up and figure out your self-worth. If after evaluating your worth you are unhappy, well improve your life.
I was asked recently why it is that women often choose not to date the nice guy and settle with the loser. Great question! The heart has a funny way of choosing what it wants. This all probably boils down to the animal side of humans. The male lion that’s nice and is a push-over is not going to be the alpha male. Period. Women like men to be men. By that I mean be able to take charge, lead the way, and make us feel safe. Unfortunately that usually leads us going down the wrong paths of love. Too many times! We aren’t dumb, we know that it’s probably not the best relationship but we always hope it will get better or he will change. Like I said, it takes going through the bull in order to realize that you deserve better! Maybe it’s even what it takes for you to appreciate the better when you find it. The universe works in mysterious ways. We just have to believe that there is someone out here for all of us.
So if you’re settling, ask yourself why. If you’re lucky, hopefully you didn’t waste too much of your time!
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