Catfishin’ for Love

MTV has a show called Catfish. It’s a series based on the indie film Catfish that documents the creator Nev Schulman’s journey to meet the person who he met online and had a developed a deeper connection. Internet dating is become so common these days that this is becoming a more common means of meeting people. Well spoiler alert for the movie, the pretty young lady that he thought he was talking to actually turned out to be a way older woman, definitely not what he was expecting. So the premise of the show is that people write in for his help to find the people with whom they have developed online relationships.

Why don’t they just video chat or meet in real life? Well the person writing in is unable to get the other person to meet them or see them which is why the person enlists the help of Nev. The act of catfishing is putting out false pictures or profiles based on lies to ensnare the attention/affections of others. The stories range from good to bad. Good being that the person they had been chatting with is actually who they said they were and the bad being that the person just made up a fake person to be.

After watching I don’t know how many seasons and episodes of Catfish I have noticed definite patterns between the people who are falsely representing themselves and those who are online searching for love. There’s nothing wrong with online dating but most of people on the show who are hiding their real selves seem to be out there looking for someone to accept them and someone to talk to them. They often have issues with their self-esteem or body so they go create someone they think is likeable so that others can interact with them.  They develop these relationships that give them outlets for their real life frustrations and receive the love/attention that they are missing. It’s not easy for everyone to be okay in their own skin or gender or sexuality. So although we all watch them waiting for the crazy twist in the plot, we have to remember that most of these people and situations are real. We forget to have compassion with others and are often disconnected with the fact that people have feelings/substance. We judge, speak reckless, and disregard each other without a second thought. We do this as a society. We have unknowingly marginalized everyone who’s outside of the box and we have to figure out how to fix it.

Accept one another. Don’t judge a book by its cover. Get to know and understand others. When it comes to a relationship, love someone who loves and accepts you. If you don’t represent yourself truthfully, how are they able to accept you? Someone who can’t accept you, you don’t need. Period. There is someone out there for you. Don’t worry, be strong and be yourself!

Side note: there is help out there for people that need it. Life is hard and there are others out there going through the same thing you are so if you need it, go get it. I.E., therapy groups, psychologist, etc. There’s nothing wrong with getting help if you need it!

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